Roaming Towards Myself

There is something very satisfying navigating foreign airports on your own. It’s a legitimate achievement to find yourself in the right Immigration queue.

This last 7 days has brought on such a personal shift. Being so hands on with the elephants helped my thoughts to quiten. Kissing and hugging these huge divine creatures is such food for your soul.

My 1st day alone in Chiang Mai. I’ve realised you can’t run away from grief, but you can find calm places to heal that don’t trigger you!

That’s what I’ve found in Chiang Mai. Peace amongst the bustle of this city.

I feel very grounded. Am I still sad, ofcourse. Being discarded & disrespected is a very hard situation to navigate. Having all your kids move out is hard, car accidents are hard and battling your own mental health is very hard.

But, do I think the universe is pushing my butt to Italy having my house sell in 3 days..Yes. Do I think my hotel cushions telling me my journey is the reward is a cosmic poke…Yes.

The fact I can get anxiety when I have an unknown number call my mobile, yet moving to another country gives me nothing but pear tells me my body and soul are starting to align.

I’m leaving chaos for calmness.

I’m leaving 9 to 5 daily grind for an unending adventure.

I roamed the night markets like a little kid unwrapping presents Christmas morning. I felt full of wonder and gratitude.

I actually spoke out loud & told myself that I was actually feeling happy in that moment, slowly but surely.  I let that feeling and acknowledgement sink in for awhile.

My body, my nervous system and my soul needed a total reset. It’s beginning. I’m starting to thrive just not survive.

And I feel so thankfull to my family and friends supporting me to continue this journey of my new life. I can’t wait to see the world in my non stop adventure.

There’s something so profound shifting in me that I feel so calm and my smile, that real smile of mine is slowly coming back.